If you already understood conflict resolution perfectly, you wouldn’t need to learn a different way to engage; you’d be able to face into the fire without any stress or tension. But most of us aren’t there yet, and conflict resolution isn’t about perfection anyhow. Conflict itself is often messier than many people are comfortable with; in order to work through a conflict, you have to get powerful feelings such as fear and anger out in the open and resolve them. Through reading the posts on this blog, you’ll not only learn tools to help you resolve conflicts but also learn to trust that conflicts are resolvable and that powerful feelings don’t need to control you.
You’ll find these tools invaluable in every area of your life. Whether you want to get a raise and are afraid your boss will deny your request, need to settle a lawsuit or just want your kids to do what they’re asked without disrespecting you, conflict resolution techniques can help you to handle the situation with confidence, grace and compassion. Best of all, you’ll no longer feel so stuck in unresolvable conflicts with yourself over how you behaved or how you wish you could remember to behave in the future. The more you intentionally practice conflict resolution techniques , the more empowered choices you’ll have in responding to stressful situations and the better you’ll feel about your life.
Conflicts are inevitable because people are different; they have different memories, experiences and ways of getting what they need in life, and sooner or later those strategies are going to conflict with one another. It’s natural to want to run away from conflict if your stomach feels tight at the thought of engaging in it or if you’ve lost friends or loved ones because of conflicts in the past. However, you can only run away for so long before a conflict finds you anyway, and in addition on some level you probably feel you are not being your best self when you refuse to engage in conflicts.
The tools on this website are designed to help you untangle yourself from all the fear and anger that keep you stuck so that you can access your best self again, even under the most challenging circumstances. By learning to shift your focus to the deeper needs that are present for both people, you empower yourself to be who you want to be and to get what you most need. Learning conflict resolution techniques is the best gift you can give yourself because you’ll need these tools again and again if you hope to live life on your own terms.